Goddess takes control

I haven't posted in awhile but feel the need to as we go farther down this road of cukolding.  So many feelings surface - confusion, nervousness, anxiety, that fuels the fire of passion, sexual energy and need to be pleased, worshipped, submitted to, and revered as the powerful, strong goddess I am. 

The last few days have rought emtions pulsing through my entire body.  they literally shoot through my limbs, trunk, abdomen, head, heart, pussy.  I cannot describe it cannot put exact words to it but as I've shared with my cucky a few things have become apparent.  For instance, when I set my sites on another submissive and attempted to seduce him by taking him out on a date my need to dominate was even more obvious, my love for getting worshipped and his attentiveness reminded me of this.  Even though he turned me down, he is very interested in doing anything else but consummate.  I call him my mindfuck because its like fucking my mind which as a powerful goddess, I also need. 

Yesterday my cucky and I talked about the feelings for this other submissive.  I finally embraced the last plea of my favorite submissive to let him be my wife.  To take this to another level.  The amount of energy and wetness that brought in to our time in bed was staggering.  As we rubbed each other and whispered to each other about what I was going to do to him and what he wanted the excitement and closeness was amazingly over the top.  We were going to a work function that I needed an escort for and I wanted to take my wife not my mindfuck.  I told him I wanted to take my wife on a date that night and I wanted her to support me and be the bubbly, friendly wooer of people as we tried to mingle and schmooze for our business' sake.  I told her throughout the night, I wanted her to tell me what a strong, powerful goddess I was.  Then, I would bring her home and dress her in lingerie and fuck her in the ass while I let her rub her clit.  Of course, based on our last post you know why she resisted this.  Instead after a long night and her she doing a wonderful job at being the supportive wife I wanted and told me all throughout the night at various times how sexy, powerful and strong I was I put her panties and held her in bed. 

So today was a whole different type of feeling.  Same pulsating energy but after I was hit on and flattered by a girl friend of ours who would be the perfect femsub type that I want to find some day.  My problem is I've never been with a woman so I am nervous and scared to attempt it.  I don't know the first thing about dominating a woman but desire to very much.  It comes natural with a man and women throughout my entire life have always seemd to want me to dominate them so it should feel natural but does not.  This little gal would be perfect and she also acts like she would throw herself in my arms if I asked.  Freaks my shit out.  The power and strentgh of my sexuality.  I almost fear the monster I could create if I embrace it.